so i'm sitting at home and listening to sad music, which brought on my mood. i am hurting emotionally right now.and there's really no good reason for it, compared to the shit some of my friends have seen or been through. but, i was just sitting here and thinking of all the hurt i've caused and all that has been inflicted on me. i think of how hurt i was when tallguy was so insensitive. i really was hurt. but, i'm strong. i dont' let my weaknesses show. tha's just life. and it goes on. and i thought of how i hurt army guyand i cried. life sucks
avearage jane later.
9 comments:
Yeah, sometimes after listening to sad music I start to feel sad and sometimes even sorry for myself. I usually change it to a happy song, and forget about it!
Amzing how music can affect your emotions, isn't it?
Anyways, if you EVER need to talk about ANYTHING, I'm here, okay? Whatever it is. I'll be there. (And you have to admit I DO sound like I'm leading you on, don't I? I'm such an idiot, because you know I'm not...right? Ha ha, I get nervous about that...but I think you know me well enough anyways....)
no, you don't sound like you're leading me on. you just sound like a really good friend. and that's what you are. honestly. there are three ppl that i trust most in my life. they are you, nathan and dave. and thanx. it's just i'm so confused. and the music doesn't help either. honestly. though sometimes i jsut keep it on the sad song, cuz it helps me get my emotions out. but then a good laugh helps every once in a while.
and maybe i should just stay away from sad songs. it's better to be happy. thanx so much spencer! you're great and now i'm in a better mood.
Really? I don't? I'm always worrying about that, online, at work, etc. It's good to have a friend like you who I can trust without that hindrance.
And yes, music does help. The right music makes me think, makes me sort out my feelings, and, one of my favorite kinds, helps me to remember my commitments. And that is usually my commitment to die (if need be).
You see I don't fear death. Death has no pain for the saved in Christ, those who truly believe in Him and His Word. For me, I know that when I die, no matter how I die (peacefully, or as a warrior, which is the death I ponder the very most), that I will go home. I'm going home, when I die. And to that, I can look forward to.
Sorry for that little rant there, but I kinda needed to say that.
yeah you needn't worry with me. we'll just be great friends forever! :D
and no prob about that rant. it was good. i honestly loved reading that. and i'm glad you have no fear of death. wish i could say the same. but, i'm glad to know you are so set in your convictions and that you believe it with all your heart. makes me happy for you. and it really made me think.
That's exactly why I said it, Amy.
To make you think.
You can have that fearless attitude towards death, you know.
maybe one day. for now i still sorta fear it. but, who knows. i can try to get to that point where i no longer fear it.
and thanx for making me think. i don't do it often enough. :D
You know what, Amy? I used to fear death, even though I was a Christian. I had so many things that I wanted to do in life, that I simply was afraid of missing out.
And you know what? I no longer have that fear. I'm ready to die, tonight.
can't say i feel the same. but, i'm glad you feel prepared. that you're okay with it.
Don't worry. Some believers have some of the fear.
God has just quelled most of it for me (as it happened seemingly without my interference).
I still would like to live out my life, but am nonetheless ready to die.
If you have faith, Amy, in the one true God and his true book, you will never need to fear death, for you will know where your home is.
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