so just yesterday i hung out with some friends for the second time in a week. and i absolutely loved it! we played rock band and wii. its so much fun! i finally was gettin the hang of playing the drums. it's tough but so worth it. lol and i can also do the guitar and bass too. of course i began singing, then i decided to try the instruments and i love it and really would so buy it to play at home! maybe i will in a few months. but right now...i'm gonna save my money for other things. but we actually first went to cheesecake factory and had lunch. it was expensive but pretty good. i think the funnest part of it all was that i got to hang with friends and be crazy and wild and have a blast! it was the perfect start to a new year...
i now have a new fav. movie. it's called hope floats!! :D i absolutely am in love with the story and of course harry connick jr.! lol but i really just thought a lot about life again...and i think i love him...but i am still so young and if he really loves me, he will support me while i still explore life and see the world and see if this is really what i want. i thought i knew what i wanted, when i told him i wanted to be with him. but i'm not so sure. i just think about all that is out there that i could be missing. maybe there is someone else out there that i'm meant to really be with. and at the same time, i wonder if i just kind of get out there and don't really pursue a relationship with him, would i be missing out on a great relationship? but then i hang with friends and just am a kid once more and i realize that i don't think i'm ready to grow up so fast. and he is, cuz he's been in life...seen a few things... traveled. and while it may hurt him that i need space a bit...i need to do it for my sanity. i will love him forever, no matter what i decide to do. but i still have a life to lead before i settle down. and if he really loves me...then he will understand my decision. i guess what i just need to make him understand, is that though i love him, i need to see the world and do some things first before i just settle down with someone. we are hanging out this weekend. and he mentioned when he called today that he wanted to take a day off from work to spend as just us...maybe spend the night at his place... and while that sounds nice...i don't think that is how things should go right now. i'll spend time with him on the weekends and such. still get to know each other. but i need to make sure that i tell him how i feel.
cuz i just keep thinking about another friend that i might have feelings for.
anyhoo...just my babbles...
averagejane signing off
1 comment:
Spend the night at his place?!?!?! Amy, not to sound harsh but that should be absolutely out of the question; I'm glad you aren't planning on doing that.
You're right. Not jumping into this is a good idea. But spend the night??? I won't deny, I'll be very upset if he tries anything...
Any more than this should be in private discussions, email/phone, whatever.
Take care, and please be careful.
Love you,
Spencer
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