Thursday, October 20, 2011

A little late night babbling

So I'm gettin ready for bed, when I get texted by a friend that I've been developing a new friendship with. He's someone I knew back in school, but we never managed to run in the same circle. However, we have found out we have more in common than i initially thought :) Specifically, we both have a great love for dance. He is taking his love to the next level, such as in competing and training, while mine remains a hobby. Yet it is nice to talk occasionally of how when we dance, it's like the world just seems right for those few moments... Okay :) that is just me talkin. I don't know if that is exactly how he feels, but I admit it thrills me to watch him pop. Though my style is different, I appreciate the fluidity of his movements.

by now, I'm sure it appears I'm in love with the guy lol ;) but the point of writing all of this is to write exactly how much this friendship means to me. often I feel I've become the boring married person :) only because I have not kept in touch with friends like I should have. so for me to find another friend, one I can talk to, tease, and remember to branch out in a while, well, that is a good thing. In fact I feel it has even improved my relationship with my hubby. I am taking time for me, time to hang with friends, which is what I needed. I had gotten so fed up with being at home almost every free moment I had, that I had begun taking it out on someone that didn't deserve it.

anyhoo, the point really of all this, is that I'm grateful for all the people I still have the honor of calling my friends, whether I keep in touch as often as I should. I had taken for granted how much energy has to be put into maintaining a friendship, and thus I have lost touch with many ppl. but I also want to say how lucky I am to have new friends, proving that I'm still able to be friendly ;) this new friendship I've been talking about this post has really opened my eyes... and it has been great. It really has been an interesting few weeks :) anyhoo :) I'm done babbling for the night ;) stay tuned for the next episode ;)

until next time, averagejane signing off...

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Hey...

so, anyone still watching my blog may be surprised to see that I am posting, after almost a year... i know. it's crazy. but, i've just had a pretty good day. one that has really struck me to come attempt to blog once again. also, one will notice that i have revamped my blog design. i'd say it was definitely about time. after the past year, i feel that a new start,of sorts, is in order.

to begin to explain, i saw my longtime friend from Cali tonight. it has been three years since we last were together. and yet, the time has flown and i cannot believe it has been that long. it feels like just yesterday we were developing our friendship, making jokes about being Mr. Collins and Cousin Elizabeth. :) those were some good times. one of the best times of my life. one where i knew where i stood. didn't have to worry about silly things like house payments ;) lol you never know how good you really have it when all you have to worry about is clothes and the occasional meal to pay for. no responsibilities beyond a job and/or school.

but i'm not saying that i want to get rid of my responsibilites that i have now. i really do enjoy my life, but i miss the person i let myself be back then. i need to find a way to incorporate my adventurous and carefree spirit into a life often dictated by responsibilties. i need to find out how to let go once in a while. thankfully, i got a chance tonight. i sat and laughed with friends, talked about the good times of high school, and watched my husband look at me like i was crazy ;) lol i had some good times. and most of that was because i had convinced myself that i didn't mind so much what ppl thought of what i did because my friends had accepted me as i was. i was able to be a goof. i was able to just let myself have fun. all too often lately, i find that i have become boring, predictable, and just no fun. i want to be able to let go so easily as i did in my high school years and a little beyond that. that is my goal for this coming year. i want to find my spunk and spirit again. i want to feel young, instead of an old married woman. that is a lot of my problem. and it all starts with me.

well, now that i babbled enough, i will go to bed. just one last thing, thanks to my friend for coming to visit. you have no idea how much it meant to me. it was a wonderful night, of which i hope many more are to come.

until next time, averagejane signing off.