Friday, February 22, 2008

i know better....

so why can't i say no? i thought i learned that from my last relationship...that i needed to be stronger and say no...well, this is a not so drastic situation where i really need to say no, but am finding myself not saying it. i like kissing him, that is the biggest problem. i know that i'll only break his heart again, yet here i go. i really need to stop this before it goes any farther...like just that he gets his hopes up and i just crush him. i need to just stop myself from being selfish and going for it cuz i like it rather than i really like him... i like talking to him as a friend...i'll talk to him tonight after we go to the movie...or before...i dunno...but i've got to talk to him tonight.... tell him that i can't break his heart again...cuz i know i will. i like flirting with him and the feel of his arms around me but it's not his arms that i like, it's just the feeling of someone's arms. or maybe it's his arms...ugh. to be honest i think it's just the feeling of someone's arms securely around me...

did i mention he quit drinking....he hasn't touched a drop in a month...that is totally amzing of him to be honest....i'm so proud of him. but yeah....

anyhoo...i'll talk to him tonight...

oh and i hate that i don't talk to r. anymore... i really should talk to him. i will on monday...

averagejane signing off...

3 comments:

The Warrior said...

You okay, sweetheart? What did I miss?

Call me, maybe?

jane said...

yeah that was just a kind of down moment...dont worry i'm good now! :D really! :D

The Warrior said...

Okay, if you say so. :-P I'm just someone who cares.