Wednesday, November 22, 2006

thoughts to keep me awake

well, last night i lay in bed thinking. i was trying to get to sleep and i couldn't because my mind wouldn't let me rest. i kept thinking about my life and how so much has changed, especially in the past few months. and i think i still very much like a great guy who my chance has come and gone with. yet i dont' know for sure where my feelings stand. i don't know. and i can't act on it because it is way too complicated. and thoughts of that kept me up for a while. but, it basically was pointless to even think about it because i can't do anything about it. yet, my mind somehow didn't catch on to it.

anyhoo. well, i'm home sick again. and i'm watching mobsters and mormons. a really funny show. i really can't believe i've never seen it before. but, so i wish that i was at school still, instead of bored out of my mind at home. and you know this horrible part in the movie just happened. the mobster family got into their car and then their car blew up. just blew up. it wasn't fair. they were coming around to be okay. and then they jsut got blown up. i know it's still a movie. but, then this kind of stuff happens in real life. like the columbine high school shooting. nothing happens the way it should. innocent people are killed just because they believe in god. and it's not fair. my mom's always telling me life isn't fair and to just get over it. but, still it makes me stop and just stand still in horror at the crazy things. and sometimes i wonder if i believed in god if i would stand up for it if someone asked me at gunpoint if i believed in god. and you know. i wish i really did know. but, that's how it all goes.

anyhoo, once again i want to thank my friends for all they do for me. all the love, friendship and encouragement they have given me.

paleo, thanx for your friendship and concern. you really have become one of my closest friends even though i've never met you face to face, though someday i hope to.

slypig. hey i've known you since we were sophomores. crazy aint' it. well, your friendship and encouragement to be myself means a lot to me. i know we'll be friends forever.

army guy, it's been great having you as a friend.you are truly a gentleman and the kindest guy i know, along with paleo. (and paleo and army guy, no denying my compliments. :D ) you are one of my greatest friends and i hope we stay in touch.

and freak, i love ya. you are so funny and you let me jsut be my crazy self.

thanx again everyone. you are all amzing.

ps. oh the mobster family didnt really blow up. thank goodness.

and right now i'll finish off my stay at home watching hogan's heroes. i need a good laugh. well, later

average jane signing off.

22 comments:

The Warrior said...

Why are you at home right now? Did you get the whole week off like some?

And Amy, I want you to know that I KNOW that you have it in you to stand up for your beliefs. You have that strength, I think. But first your'e going to have to believe in Him, before you can stand for Him.

After all, He did die for you. For me. For all of us. His death was so terrible that I cannot even imagine it. He was betrayed by a disciple, the rest forsook Him, He became sin so that his own father could not even look at Him. And He even went to Hell. All for you, Amy. All for you and me.

It stands to reason that we should at least stand for Him, in the small ways that we humans can.

And if you want to talk about anything, anything, you let me know. I'm here for you, Amy.

As a friend,

Spencer

jane said...

well, i'm home sick, technically. i wasn't feeling too good. so i got to stay home.

and thanx. it's good to know you have faith in me. honestly, i wish i had the same in myself.

and thanx. i'll let you know if i need to talk. thanx a bunch.

ames

Anonymous said...

Howdy. I'm in that movie Mobsters and Mormons and Google Alerts tipped me off to your comments. I'm glad you like the movie. I have a small bit part - three lines as the pizza waiter in the restaraunt the mobster family went to.

But man, that was a major spoiler you gave away about the movie!

Anyway, like I said, glad you liked it.

The Warrior said...

Oh, I see. I thought you said you were home sick, not sick at home...see what I meant?

I'm sorry, are you okay? Is there anything I can do for you?

I hate it when girls get sick....

Let me know if you need anything.

jane said...

alex, hey that's cool and i remember who you are in the movie. way cool. i live right by the chef tom's restaraunt. and i really did love the movie.

sorry about the spoiler, i just had to let them all know that the family was okay! :D

spencer. yeah sorry i was at home, sorta sick. but, yeah i'm okay now. it was just a head cold. i was pretty stuffed up and really tired. but, thanx for your concern.

you are just a good friend to be concerned. thanx and it just helps to have you to talk to. :D

i'm better now and getting ready for turkey day!

The Warrior said...

I'm very glad that you are better! I'll see you around, okay?

jane said...

definitely! plan on seeing me around. on the net at least! HEE HEE!

The Warrior said...

Wouldn't miss it for the world!

jane said...

good to know!!! you're a great friend.

The Warrior said...

AAAWWWW!!!!!!!!!

jane said...

oh no, the "awww" starts up again!

hee hee! :D

The Warrior said...

Well, I think that's the one word I say to you the most...and a close second is "sweet"!

Lydia said...

Awww... thanks Amy! I'm glad you have updated.

Anyway, funny story... your blog is on my favorites, and it didn't show your updates. I had to refresh it to get them all... I wonder how many times I've come to your blog and been dissapointed when you really had updated. Tee hee hee. That's not really funny, but oh, well.

Anyway, I should rent mobsters and mormons if it really is good. Muah!

jane said...

yeah you say aww alot, along with sweet, spencer. :D

and lydia, of course i've updated! hee hee! and yeah mobstors and mormons is really funny! :D

The Warrior said...

Yes, indeed I do say it! Aww, you sweet girl!

(Nathan, so what if I sound like I'm flirting? :-P)

jane said...

hee hee! well, if you dont' care that you sound like your flirting, that's totally fine. i don't find anything wrong with it!!!! :D :D

The Warrior said...

Well I only let my self say it because that's how I feel, it's true, you know I'm not flirting, and I'm really not flirting!!!!! (If that made sense, lol!)

jane said...

yeah it did! :D never fear! :D

The Warrior said...

Well, I don't fear it, and that's because I know I can trust you to take me for who I am without thinking I'm flirting.

jane said...

oh good! :D

The Warrior said...

That's exactly what I think!

jane said...

yeah i have to admit. it's always a better week when i get on my blog and post and am able to read your comments. it's guaranteed that i will read your comments and crack up laughing or just smile real big. and right now i have that tendency to smile real big! :D