hickeys...he he

Lol so here i am at work. i know i probably should not be goofin off on the net...but i just thought i'd blog a sec. lol



so let's just say that i have a few lovely little hickeys..lol not the first time. but i got one of the funniest responses today, from a customer. lol just to explain a little, i have a few along the line of my neck/collarbone...hehe... and i actually am wearing a higher collared shirt so they don't show as much. but the the collar keeps slippin a bit low.anyhoo, so this guy says to me, " did you get attacked by a vacuum?" lol i just kinda laughed and said " somethin like that." lol then he said, "nasty little suckers." lol it really made me laugh. he didn't say anything else, and then went on his way. so i assume he knew that they were hickeys...lol but yeah... that was my laugh for the day..

i think i've had some funny responses the last time i got a major hickey or two...lol i had the ladies in my office making fun of me..lol my favorite has to be Connie's reaction. She is probably late 50's to mid 60s...and she said to me, " back in my day, we would get them where you couldn't see them, where you could hide them." lol that totally made me laugh. i mean, jsut imagining her having to even need to hide a hickey! lol to be honest, i could see it...lol but it's just too dang funny...

oh yeah...then today, the ladies noticed somewhat of my current hickeys...lol made some comment about "did you notice the little trail on her neck?" lol kind of said it a bit softer than normal...lol but just almost a stage whisper...like to see if i noticed them lol it was funny.

lol oh and then i was telling my friend Callie, here at work, about the guy's reaction from this morning. and she said i should tell my boyfriend that real love doesn't need to leave a mark...lol it was cute! i might tell him that. :D then i told callie that well, i'm half to blame...hehe. anyhoo...lol

well that's all for now...good times :D i'm lucky today cuz my boyfriend is coming by to take me to lunch! yay! can't wait to see him! well, 'til later!

averagejane signing off

happily ever after...forever

growing up, every little girl hears the fairytales about how the princess gets the prince charming and lives happily ever after. and as every little girl grows up, those fairytales stay with her. sometimes that is what they base how a relationship rates on a scale of happily ever after. sometimes, a girl can get lost inside fairytales retold, thinking she will never find that prince charming for her. sometimes too, a girl can say that her fairytale won't happen like that cuz like the song called cinderella, originally done by i5 and remade by the groups Play and The Cheetah Girls, whose chorus is " i dont wanna be like cinderalla sitting in a dark old dusty cellar, waiting for somebody to come and set me free. i don't wanna be like snow white waiting for somebody to come and save me on a horse of white, unless i'm riding side by side..."

i admit that a part of me is totally like the song cinderella...that i don't need anyone to come "save" me. but the other part of me wants the other part of the story. the fairytale romance. every little bit. i want to be swept off my feet. but, this part is kept hidden more or less because of my not needing to be rescued feeling...i dont' know why i wrote this but anyways....the point is that i've found my "fairytale romance". and it happened when i least expected it. i can't believe i got so lucky...honestly. i know i've probably said this like a million times, but i don't care. it's just me expressing how i love life.! i love jay! there i said it so the whole world can know! lol i love jay and he loves me.

anyhoo, also, even while i was still more active in the LDS church, i was never one to really really want a temple marriage. like it sounded cool, but it was like oh, yah whatev. i kind of just assumed i'd get married there and yah...like i didn't really imagine getting married anywhere else or any other way. then especially once i really started drifting away even more from religion, i didn't care. and it didn't really matter cuz there wasn't anyone in the near future in my life, that i would have to make that decision with. and then of course i made some choices that now make it not possible, for now at least. then , along came jay. :D lol and my mom actually said to me, after i was tellin her how much fun i had had with jay, how much i had enjoyed my time with him, " can't you see now this is how it's supposed to be like in a relationship? can't you see now why some people would want this to last forever? " and the funny thing is , yeah it now kind of has slowly been coming more clear. i can see why ppl want to be together forever. if that were possible i would work hard for it. which is actually why i am in the process of working my ... issues...out. i want to have a chance at that happily ever after...forever.

but yah...life is great! lol i'm in love. and loving it! i'm going crazy during the day though cuz i miss jay tonz! then again i just miss him all day long. cuz even though i get to talk to him at night...i really wish i could see him every night. lol but i'll have to survive with just a couple nights a week...lol it just feels like my life is complete when he is around, like everything is perfect. lol cuz it is... anyhooo...

oh and i just have to mention how much i love this lady at my work. her name is shawna and she is my life saver and the most amzing person here. no matter what crap ppl. may say about her, she has always got my back. and i will forever be grateful for that. cuz actually just today or yesterday, joyce (my supervisor) was complaining to shawna saying " why does amy need breaks? nobody else in this company gets a break. " and shawna said something to the effect of, " she needs those breaks. she doesn't get to wander the store. she is stuck at her desk." and joyce was all like, " oh is it that bad?" lol i love shawna!! :D he he

well that is enough for today!

laters

averagejane signing off!

falling....head over heels

kind of funny how some days ( or nights in this case) you really get to thinking about life, about things you do, why some names or things have significance in your life. i was just thinking about blog names. it took me a bit to understand my boyfriend's. lol then i found out the first significance is that it has a star trek reference... ;) felt pretty cool once i figured that out. but then i thought to mine. yeah...just a silly, normal title...but it's actually based off the title of a song that really had meaning to me especially at the time i created this blog. pretty much the song says, i'm trying to find my place in the diary of jane. i really liked the lyrics and kind of "adopted" , per se, the name jane, kind of just considering myself an average jane kind of girl. and when i began blogging, it was kind of in the middle of a part in my life that i really was trying to find out where i was going with my life. hence the part trying to find my place in the diary of jane...trying to find where i fit in my own life...and up until about a month ago, i still had no clue. well, of course i had the normal oh i want to go to college, get a good job, and travel. but i was still trying to figure out who i was, what i wanted to really get out of life. this was about the time i really realized that i didn't believe in god. i really didn't care about religion. but this past month...one thing has come into my life, specifically a person. someone that i have grown to care about beyond what i thought possible in just a short amount of time. sure i knew jay in high school...but we didn't really connect as we have now. i laugh when i think it is all thanx to face book that we are together...lol a part of me is wishing that i had found him sooner and been able to be with him. but to be honest, i think a great part of our amazing understanding of each other and our struggles, have come from having gone separate paths, yet similar, this past year. it has shaped us into the people we needed to be, before we could both appreciate this wonderful relationship we have.


tonight, we had the deepest, most soul-bearing conversation i have ever had with anyone. and for the first time, the response was not disappointment, or judgement. it was one of " i understand, i have been there." it was that way on both ends. and it amazed me how wonderful jay was about all of it...like i wasn't planning on having this deep of a discussion tonight...yet it just felt like the right time. and it turned out to be the best thing. our relationship has acquired a whole new depth to it. it's like....well, i can't even describe it. but it's the best feeling in the world. to know that you can tell someone how much you care about them, how much you just want to be with them, and know the feelings are reciprocated. to find that we are both far from perfect, yet so perfectly matched. to feel that i can trust them with anything...all of this combines into the greatest feeling in the world.


also, a song came on the radio today. it's called U got it bad by Usher. for those not familiar with it... here are the lyrics that really stick with me...



"you got it, you got it bad,
when you're on the phone,
hang up and you call right back,
you got it you got it bad,
if you miss a day without your friend your whole life's off track....
when you say that you love her and you really know that everything that used to matter, don't matter no more..."

( here's a link to hear all the song... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=15bWP1O-bK0)

yah....that song just sticks with me, cuz i miss jay constantly... my life just feels almost complete with him just around...his absence pretty much creates a hole in my life, that can't be filled by anything else....yah...safe to say, i am falling for him...heck i have fallen...hard...and the hardest part is that my logical side is trying to tell me it's not possible...cuz i mean i have all my plans that are supposed to happen...i was supposed to stay away from getting romantically involved with anyone...yet here i am, so happy, so giddy...the luckiest woman alive...i have the greatest guy in the world and i hope i never lose him...cuz i've fallen hard....but it's not a bad thing...except for when we are apart... :) but yeah...not sure if i am still making sense...but i'm glad my life is on a better track...

well, i probably should sleep...g'night...

average jane signing off...

life is good! :D

once again i had the time of my life. mostly just because i was with jay. any time i can spend with him is the best...he is the best thing to happen to me. i'm so freakin lucky!!! lol

so today what did we do...lol we went to the clark planetarium and watched one of their IMAX shows. we have a duo membership there, so we figured why not use it. and i got to chose what we saw. lol we watched a film on mummies. it was way cool!!! i was so intrigued and would have loved to know more...lol must be my inner geek coming out. lol i try to repress it lol but i don't have to when i'm with jay, cuz he is just as geeky or more!! lol not that its a bad thing! i love it. because i don't feel like i have to explain things like 5 times until they get it. but yah...we had his sister kellyann along with us and she got bored i think watching it. lol but i had a blast! then we dragged poor jay along with us to some other stores lol. he's such a good sport. lol then we stopped in one of my fav. stores and jay loves it too. lol Barnes and Noble bookstore! lol gotta love books. it took all my will not to leave with an armful of books! lol we kind of teased jay by taking him into the astrology section, knowing full well he hates horoscopes and astrology...lol he was a good sport! lol we didn't stay there too long. lol but it's great that we have a mutual love of books! lol :D then we went on to bath and body works and we left after a bit cuz the mixed smells were getting to us both ... oh, then we decided to go to temple square lol. and the moment we walked in the gates, we were ambushed by this old gentleman that volunteers there . lol yes i mean ambush. like we had walked inside and been barely inside two seconds and he was like hi!!! have you been here before? lol but it was all good. and we ended up taking a tour. it was actually kinda cool..lol

but overall i think the best thing was just having jay near. i mean i was content to just walk along with his hand in mine, or his arms around me. i was comfortable and i didn't care who was looking. i feel comfortable in who i am and who i was with. most often, before me and jay were going out...i would just feel awkward somewhat on dates and uncomfortable with the guys...even though i liked them. like i was okay when it was just us, or with friends, but when i was out in public, it was awkward to me. i know it sounds weird...but that is how it was. then whenever i'm with jay, it's like none of that matters. i'm just with him and i don't seem to care much anymore. some things like us swinging our entertwined hands and skipping, lol, were totally me coming out of my bubble...but that is normal lol. though today it was fun actually lol :D lol anyhoo...so then, jay dropped me back at my house around 6 pm...lol we had been together for around 6 hours... :D but then we lingered on the doorstep. i didn't want him to go, and he didn't want to go either...lol :D i really am falling for him...:) life is great. it really is all going fantabulous~! can't wait to see him again...lol

well, laters...

averagejane floating off! :D

lovin life

*sigh* i don't think my life could be any more perfect than it is right now. i've got the best guy in the world...a job that is amzing....amzing friends...just everything is perfect. i don't feel like my life is just spiraling off into nowhere, like it has often over the last year or so. i would look at where i had been and mentally slapped myself. how did i get into the dumbest situations. you know...i will tell you. i was tryin so hard to break out of my "bubble", so trying to shock others, or prove them wrong, that i really wasn't choosing the things i really wanted, that i knew could not bring me anything but happiness. i chose the things i thought would make me happy, but that only lasted temporarily and i constantly set myself up for disappointment. but now i feel i've finally broke out of that pattern, come off that path. my life has taken a turn for the better, heck the best!!! my life could not possibly be much better than this.

two songs come to mind. one is called "i'm only me when i'm with you" by taylor swift. i love that song....just go on yahoo music to listen to it. but the part that i love is the chorus..." i'm only up when you're not down, don't wanna fly if you're still on the ground..." it's just cute...lol i've decided this song for various reasons is my song for jay...i mean he's never down! so that means i'm always happy. he makes me happy. i don't think i've felt this giddy and happy and floating on cloud nine! i don't think i could ever not want to be with him. and it also feels like i've known himf forever and that we have been dating longer than just almost a week. maybe that is cuz we have seen each other literally every night this week...lol or day as the case may be...lol and each time the only thing making it any easier to let him go, is the thought that i will see him in a few hours...lol well, sometimes more than a few. but still lol :D yeah...i feel so freaking lucky to have found a guy like this. i can't believe i am this lucky. he tells me he thinks he is luckier to have me, and i just say, i think i am so much luckier. how did i get such a cute, good looking!, sweet, adorable guy to be with me!?!?! lol yeah i really am lucky...and one thing i know for sure in this world....everything happens for a reason. and at the moment, i don't know why i got this lucky. but i do know that my previous relationships, even though they were crappy, had to happen so that i really could appreciate this great guy i have. jay is the sweetest guy i could ever hope for. i hope to not lose him...

but now that i have sufficiently babbled on about just jay...lol now i should probably mention what we did!~! lol we went to an improv show first off...well, that was after day murray music lol. but i loved the improv show! it was hilarious and i can't wait to go back next friday! lol me and jay have already planned that!! :D yay i think it's one of the times i have laughed the hardest in a long time.

then we decided to get something to eat when we got out. lol it was like 9 pm or 930, so we didn't eat until like 10 lol but then we hung at jay's house and him being a good guy (lol :D ) had to make sure i was home before midnight... i stalled a few times lol....he he ...he he...ha. but yah funny stuff...but lets just say that once again, jay amazed me at how amazing he is....

so i finally came home at 11:30 ish...and stalled more on the porch..lol (just one more jay...lol he he : D ) but i just couldn't resist....i had the greatest guy in the world in my arms...would you want to let go if you had the best person in the world with you? :) anyhoo...

well, i should go to sleep! i get to see him in 11 hours and 42 minutes!~~ :D yay!!! *kisses to my guy*

avearagejane floating away on cloud nine

oh p.s.. lol i forgot to mention the other song in my head. it's called "some hearts" by carrie underwood...the part really sticking with me is " i've never been the kind that you call lukcy,always stumblin around in circles, but i must have stumbled into something. look at me am i really alone with you...." lol *floats away...*