life is good! :D

once again i had the time of my life. mostly just because i was with jay. any time i can spend with him is the best...he is the best thing to happen to me. i'm so freakin lucky!!! lol

so today what did we do...lol we went to the clark planetarium and watched one of their IMAX shows. we have a duo membership there, so we figured why not use it. and i got to chose what we saw. lol we watched a film on mummies. it was way cool!!! i was so intrigued and would have loved to know more...lol must be my inner geek coming out. lol i try to repress it lol but i don't have to when i'm with jay, cuz he is just as geeky or more!! lol not that its a bad thing! i love it. because i don't feel like i have to explain things like 5 times until they get it. but yah...we had his sister kellyann along with us and she got bored i think watching it. lol but i had a blast! then we dragged poor jay along with us to some other stores lol. he's such a good sport. lol then we stopped in one of my fav. stores and jay loves it too. lol Barnes and Noble bookstore! lol gotta love books. it took all my will not to leave with an armful of books! lol we kind of teased jay by taking him into the astrology section, knowing full well he hates horoscopes and astrology...lol he was a good sport! lol we didn't stay there too long. lol but it's great that we have a mutual love of books! lol :D then we went on to bath and body works and we left after a bit cuz the mixed smells were getting to us both ... oh, then we decided to go to temple square lol. and the moment we walked in the gates, we were ambushed by this old gentleman that volunteers there . lol yes i mean ambush. like we had walked inside and been barely inside two seconds and he was like hi!!! have you been here before? lol but it was all good. and we ended up taking a tour. it was actually kinda cool..lol

but overall i think the best thing was just having jay near. i mean i was content to just walk along with his hand in mine, or his arms around me. i was comfortable and i didn't care who was looking. i feel comfortable in who i am and who i was with. most often, before me and jay were going out...i would just feel awkward somewhat on dates and uncomfortable with the guys...even though i liked them. like i was okay when it was just us, or with friends, but when i was out in public, it was awkward to me. i know it sounds weird...but that is how it was. then whenever i'm with jay, it's like none of that matters. i'm just with him and i don't seem to care much anymore. some things like us swinging our entertwined hands and skipping, lol, were totally me coming out of my bubble...but that is normal lol. though today it was fun actually lol :D lol anyhoo...so then, jay dropped me back at my house around 6 pm...lol we had been together for around 6 hours... :D but then we lingered on the doorstep. i didn't want him to go, and he didn't want to go either...lol :D i really am falling for him...:) life is great. it really is all going fantabulous~! can't wait to see him again...lol

well, laters...

averagejane floating off! :D

update pt. 1

so i guess it's time for an update...lol it's been a crazy while. lol

yeah so the previous entry. i know what you all think happened and let me say...yea it happened and it was hella fun...lol worth it even though the next morning i really just wanted to sleep! lol but just so that there isn't any doubt, here is an account of the event! lol

so thurs. april 24th, a friend at work came up to me, his name is j., and asked what i was doin that night. i told him i had a short class then pretty much nothing. so he asked me if i wanted to go to a Jazz game that night and i told him sure. lol it was funny cuz i remember him being all like flustered lol. but anyhoo...we kept in contact for the rest of the day and i ended up skipping my ASL final to get to the game early for dinner and such. lol but so i met him and his roomie and his roomie's girlfriend at j.'s place. then we drove up together in j's roomie's car. it was pretty cool lol. but i liked his friend and the girlfriend. they were cool and nice to me. it was cool because i could tell that they both were the ones who had been popular in high school, a crowd i hadn't run with. so to just be accepted as is was really cool for me. anyhoo...gettin on a tangent. once we got the Delta center, now called the Energy Solutions arena, we went and got our tickets and such and i found out we were in the season ticket holders section!! lol and we got the VIP stuff like dinner and a free shirt, etc. but so we all got somethin to eat and i settled while they went off to get some beer. there was unlimited beer with the VIP dinner. the funny part is that j. came back with a beer for me. lol he just comes up behind me and says, " i got you a heineken." lol i laughed on the inside. i guess he just thought that 1) i was old enough to drink and 2) that i did drink. lol it was way cool. so i drank it. then as we went to go into the game, j. asked if i wanted another one. lol i said sure. so then we went and watched the game! it was a blast. i found out after j. asked me to go to the game that it was the first playoff game. that made me even more excited to go. then to have fantastic seats on the 6th row, wow it was a good night to start with. then i was in good company with j. but about8-10 min before halftime, i really had to pee~ hee hee. i know TMI. but it was funny to me. cuz then at halftime i had to go a gain... anyhoo. also at halftime, we made our way back to where we had dinner and got some more beer. i think j. had like 3 more. i had one more. that was plenty for me. i took it back to the game. then we finished watching the game! damn it was a close game!!! i loved it it was so intense!

the game finished around 11:30 pm. we were all so high on the game and of course the beer. :D but then we headed back to j. and his roomie's place. i ended up staying there with j. for about 2 more hours and then his roomie, b., went to his girlfriend's place. it was a blast. i watched some family guy! it was my first time really watching it and i loved it. hee hee. it was funny. but then about partway through our hangout, he kissed me...lol he's a good kisser...we kissed a bit, i'll leave it at that. :D i finally left his place at around 2:30 am. got home about 3 am.

the next day at work, i was tired. no duh! and i really feel bad cuz i was kind of a bitch at work! he he i think it was a mixture of lack of sleep and my first three beers all in one night! yeah crazy mix!

well i'll finish this update in a bit...gotta close up work! :D

average jane signing off....

a fuckin mess....

god...i feel like shit right now. lol amzed that i'm laughin a bit on the inside while wanting to curl up in a ball and just sleep for the next day. i've never felt this tired...that could from combined lack of sleep and one too many drinks...god, this is crazy...i felt good last night, just comfortable with him. laughing...cheering on the team...then back at his place just laughing while we watched tv...feeling comfortable enough to just fall asleep inside his arms...wishing i could have stayed there and just called in sick to work...

now i wish there was some way to not feel like shit. maybe if i get some sleep...tried coffee, didn't help this time...maybe a drink would revive me...dunno...just falling asleep...


averagejane signing off...(what a crazy day...but i'm okay...just feelin like shit temporarily...feelin like a fuckin mess...)

just life and such

well, it's been a few days since i've written, but i have a good explanation. i got into an accident on tuesday and i've been in the hospital..... just kidding. about the hospital part though.... i really did get in an accident. it was only a fender bender. and only damaged my car really. it would cost me around the same to replace the parts i damaged as to get a new car. so my parents will prob. just get a new car eventually...but my car is okay and i'm okay. i had a little whiplash, but not too bad. and of course i got a ticket for negligent collision. you know, i don't really know why i was so distracted and why my car didn't stop or why i didn't just swerve. i had been texting a bit, but i had plenty of space to stop and i slammed on my brakes and i was only going like 45 mph. but i guess maybe i was just so distracted. but if i ever get caught in that sort of situation again, i will remember to swerve and save myself the ticket and the damage. but yeah.

oh and so that night when i was in the accident i was actually on my way to pick up chris to go to the rodeo. and i was all high strung when i got to his house, but he was so sweet and we just relaxed and i calmed down. he was amzing about all of it. it actually turned out to be better that we just hung out at his apartment. i really had a good time. and he was just so cute. it all turned out okay.

but then on wednesday, july fourth we ended up going to sugarhouse for the fireworks and i had a good time. it was really good fireworks, the best i've seen i have to admit. we walked back to my car. and then we hung there for a sec. and kissed. lol it was good...but then we managed to make it back to his place to hang for about 20 min. then he walked me to my car, and kissed me goodnight. then i managed to get home before midnight!!!! :D

but, thursday robert showed up for work. and it was kind of funny to see him. and you know? i really don't have such hard feelings for him. not anymore. i've kind of gotten over it sort of. like i still think he's a jerk, but i don't care anymore because i'm not gonna be fooled again. and i can actually talk to him civilly and say hi. but yeah. that chapter is closed, and we just exist as acquaintances.

but, so i have a "date" lol for saturday. somehow, my friend meisha ended up setting up a date with my cousin and she was talking to me about it and told me that she wanted to know if i wanted to come with her. so i told her sure. and i called up my bud nathan to see if he wanted to come with me! and it looks like we're gonna hang on saturday. cuz we haven't hung out for a month. but yeah that should be a blast.


anyhoo, so i thought that i should take things slower with chris. and i wasn't gonna do anything this weekend with chris, that's why i didn't ask him to come with me on saturday. but he might call tonight, and we'll probably do something. whether we go to a movie or just hang at his place.

oh and i have to put in a plug here. so there is something called net radio. it's really pretty much amzing. but ppl are trying to make it so costly that it would basically get rid of net radio. and i don't know how many of you listen to it. but for my sake and those that listen, take a stand. let your congressmen know that they shouldn't up the price of the net radio. thats why i put the banners on my blog. so please take a stand and go to savenetradio.org and do what you can!!! please cuz there is not much time left...

but yeah....well, that's all for this time. til later.

averagejane signing off!

oh and side note, so i hadn't worn my second piercing for a while and i tried to put an earring back in, and amzingly i got it back it. so yeah.... but i love life...:D

a first time for everything...

so it's been a few days and it seems a lifetime of things has happened to me in them. i feel changed and different, just a tad older and more in control of my life. it's kind of nice. but let me tell you what's happened and you can see what i mean.

so on thursday i got the biggest shocker of my life. just when i thought i could really believe robert, it turns out i was wrong. i guess maybe i just wanted so much to believe him that i disbelieved what everyone else was telling me. everyone had told me that chris would never lie. and it took someone else coming up and telling me that robert did have a girlfriend and that they actually got engaged to wake me up. i was just sitting at my desk when gilbert from the pumps dept. came to my desk and said,' robert's girlfriend just came and was showing off her engagement ring.' and he said that robert had a smug/proud look on his face when she was showing it off...silly me to actually believe him. but chris came up about ten or so minutes later and the first thing i said to him was,' i'm sorry. i'm sorry that i didn't believe you were telling the truth.' and he said,' thanx.' and so i got that all sorted out. but i really wanted to slug robert so hard for lying to my face three consecutive times that he didn't have a girlfriend. i hate that i still believed him. but that's now in the past. but before i found all this out i actually told chris, ' you know, whatever drama has gone on, let's just forget it. i don't care anymore.' cuz chris is a great guy. but then he did turn out to be telling the truth. silly me for that. so then we still planned on going out on friday.

so the funny part of this whole story is that chris doesn't have a car. he has a motorcycle but is still trying hard to register it. so our date on friday, he walked from his place down to the dollar theater and we watched a movie and ate something at arbys. it was way fun. after the movie, we just sat on the back of my car and talked. about everything. it was so cool cuz not only is he a great listener, but he actually discusses things with me. that's one difference that i found from any other guy i have liked. and it was so amzing. and we got to talkin about the mtns. and i found that he loves to go up in the mtns. so we kind of said, oh one time we have to go up there. and he had a waterfall he wanted to show me. but we set no definite time. then, i had to leave to make it back a half hour after my curfew. my parents weren't really mad.

then saturday the 30th. i went to the taylorsville dayzz parade and i actually got a bit sunburnt. but i texted chris to see if he was awake yet. and he finally texted me around noon. and i was out delivering flyers for sumthing. and he asked me what my plans were for that day. and i told him i just had to pass out these flyers, do some dishes, then take a shower. but i asked him why. and he said that he wanted to show me his waterfall. so we made plans for me to call him as soon as i was ready. then i picked him up and we went up little cottonwood canyon and found his waterfall and actually explored off to the side of it. it was fun. then i told him about donut falls and he said he'd never been there. so he said, why dont' you show me. cuz he'd shown me somthing new so now i'd show him somthing new. so we drove up big cottonwood canyon. and i forgot how far up the canyon it was so i got scared that i was going the wrong way. but i found it. and so we drove up to the parking lot and found a space. then we began our hike. it didnt' take us too long to hike it. but then we got to the waterfall and you have to climb up to the place where the water actually falls. it was a little difficult geting up, but chris was so sweet and helped me up. there was actually one part that was so difficult that he really was helping me. and he pulled me up and i kind of fell into his arms. it was comfortable....but then we got to the top and he asked if i had ever been above the falls. and i hadnt' and told him i really was too scared to go up there. and he pestered me a little asking if i was curious to see what was up there. but then i said fine lets go. and he said, you don't have to if you dont' want to. i won't make you. but i said no i'm goin up. so i went up with him coming behind me. and you know. it was even more beautiful up there. it was breathtaking and gorgeous. i'm glad he pushed me to try going up. he's just a great guy to encourage me to try new things and get me out of the bubble i've been in so long. but then we waded in the little pool at the top, then decided to climb back down. we got back down to the main trail and i kind of kept slipping and such, so i held his hand for support. and then i said, i guess you'll just have to hold my hand so i don't fall. and then we held hands the whole way down. it was amzing... he's so sweet. but then i took him home and dropped him off about 7 pm. then i went home and got ready for the fireworks cuz my pants were all dusty from the hike. but so then at about 9 pm i went and picked him up and we went to the fireworks. he met my parents and they were nice and such. but then we went and found our own spot and laid down to watch the fireworks. we ended up holding hands. and then after the fireworks were over, we just stayed in the park, just cuddling and talking. there were moments of silence but they were reflective silence rather than uncomfortable. it was way nice. then about 11:39 i checked my phone and said, i probably should go so i make curfew. and he said yeah maybe you should. but then i bent to get my flip flops and he put his arm around me and pulled me close saying 'you're not going anywhere!' lol and i just snuggled up to him and didnt argue cuz i didn't want to leave. but then at one point i turned to look at him and he was looking at me. then his hand went to my chin and he pulled me close, and kissed me. it was so cute. it wasn't perfect as this was my first kiss. but it was so cute nonetheless. *sigh* and i told him it was my first kiss. and he was so cute about it and how i was not experienced in kissing. but then we did leave cuz it was now like 12:10 or so in the morning. so then we walked back to my car, hand in hand. and i drove him home. once i got to his apartment, i turned off the car and just sat there with him. cuz i didn't want him to go. but then he turned to me and kissed me several more times. i think i did better kissing those times. but i feel that i will have many chances to improve.... :D so i look forward to whatever comes of this.

of course i didn't tell my parents of this or my sister rachel. cuz i don't know how they would react. i told only holly. cuz she understands... it's nice. but yeah. i was floating on cloud nine last night and i can't wait to see him tomorrow. *sigh* my life is going right for once. and it's totally been unplanned...

average jane signing off...(i'm so far gone...)

so more craziness....

so hey for my friend's sake i'm coming on to say, ' i made it back safe and sound from my hangout with jesse!' but at the same time, things are different. cuz here's what happened.

well, the hangout started out like 15-20 minutes late cuz i got lost and couldn't find parking. but then i caught up with jesse and we really had a good time. it was fun to be able to hang out and just chat. cuz when we first met, we went to dinner and a movie, and didn't have much time to talk. so this time was good. but near the end of our hangout, we went into the virgin megastore at gateway, cuz it had some sale cuz it was closing. and i have come to love the store for its sales. so we wandered around and talked and looked at cds and movies. then as we were walkin up to pay for my cd, jesse put his arm around my waist and said, 'i'm sorry for not talking much.' and i told him it was alright. and that i talk a lot. and when he put his arm around my waist for that brief few seconds, that's when i first wondered if he had started to really like me. and looking back, he seemed to recall bits about my life i had told him that i wouldn't have expected someone to remember. cuz i mentioned my ex. and he immediately said, 'dave?' like he remembered his name. this happened with a couple of other little facts. but then when we went up to the counter to pay, he saw that they had harry potter 1 and 2 for half off. so i was like oh... i want those...hmm.. and he did the whole arm around my waist thing but a bit different and longer. so i began to suspect something more. but it wasnt' until we were in the parking lot under the gateway that i began to think really much of anything. he walked me to my car and i was saying goodbye. then he put his arms on my waist as i was facing him and pulled me closer to him. he then said, ' i know this is out of the blue, but do you want to go out with me?' and i kind of hesitated. and he said, 'it's okay to say yes or no, either way.' and i said, 'possibly' and he said 'it's okay to say no.' and i said, 'i'd like to go on dates with you, but not boyfriend/girlfriend like.' and he said okay. then we said goodbye, hugged and he went to find his car.

then i came home and i was like oh what am i getting myself into....so i wrote him an email clarifying that i would like to go on dates, but just as friends, so i guess that's more of a hangout. but i told him that there is actually a guy i'm interested in right now. and that's robert. i like him and i want the chance to get to know him better. cuz he's way nice. and cute and funny. and i really want to go on a date with him. i wish that chris didn't have to be in the way. but i know how it hurts to lose a friendship. it really bites. and i am not gonna be the reason that robert and chris' friendship dies. so yeah. but maybe after i go on one date with chris, it'll work itself out. cuz i don't want to hurt chris' feelings. but i really want to go on a date with robert....it's way too complicated. oh well, at least it's not three guys anymore that i have to worry about. i'm glad i dealt with that before i dragged myself into a mess where i hurt a friend i care about. so yeah...

but i really did have a good day. i'm just tired....oh and i got my cell phone! it's exciting cuz i love being able to text ppl and call them. like i called jesse to know i'd be a little late. and i called home to tell them i'd be home in like 20 min. to 1/2 an hour. it was nice...but yeah. i just hope robert calls tonight. he said he would, but we got cut off yesterday in the middle of our conversation, so he might think i'm mad at him....or sumthin like that... so i still hope he calls. but hey i g2g...

average jane signing off...(life is crazy, but it'll settle soon..)

it's the night!! :D

so, tonight is the night of the date. right now its 7:29. and he should be calling soon... cuz here's how things went at work.

well, we were really busy and we were down 5 ppl on my level, and 2 in the warehouse. so robert was so busy that he didnt' have time to talk to me until about closing time. so he comes up to me and says,'wow this is the first time today i've had a chance to talk to you.' cuz they were busy. but then he said that he didn't have time to do what he had wanted to do, cuz he had to walk and get his car from someplace. and he had a few other things to do. he told me he wanted to take me out to dinner and a movie, but asked if i would be okay to do something around 8 pm. i told him i was okay with that. but then he asked, 'well, can i have your phone number so i can call you?' and i said, ' that's silly, why would i want to give you my number? ' totally sarcastic, but i gave him my number. then i told him that i was actually getting a cell phone next month. then he realized that this was my home phone number. and he said, ' i'm calling your home phone?' and i said, 'yah, but don't worry. i'll have the house to myself by the time you call.' so he said he'd call me.

and now it's 7:40 pm. i hope he calls. cuz i really want to go out with him. cuz as i sit here i think that maybe he changed his mind, maybe he lost my phone number. or any countless things. and so i sit here waiting.... but yeah....anyhoo...hope he calls...

averagejane signing off...still waiting (now 7:47 pm...)

i've got a date! and i can't wait..... : D

otay.... so today has to be considered one of the funnier days of my existence! :D so i was at work and me and robert did our whole smile/whatever exchange a few times during the day. there is this girl, oyuna, who works with me. she's like late 20s, early 30s and is married. she was helping me fold invoices for mailing and she asked me, 'amy, do you have a boyfriend?' and i told her i didn't. then i said, ' but i have a date on friday! ' and she said, ' oh, with who?' and i said, ' robert.' she looked at me and said, ' robert, like in the warehouse?' and i said, 'yah.' and she told me that she thought he had a girlfriend. and stuff and i told her that i was pretty sure he didn't, but i was gonna actually ask him today just to be safe. and i asked her how she was sure he had a girlfriend. she told me that some girl comes and picks him up after work each day. and i told her that he told me it was his sister emily. and when i saw her pick him up, they acted like brother and sister and not at all like boyfriend/ girlfriend. then, she says,'well, i'm gonna go check on something.' so she leaves. and i don't hear from her for ten minutes.

so i went on my break and i was in the bathroom, when oyuna comes in and says, 'amy?' and i say yah... and so she comes in and says,' maybe i was mistaken, some of the guys have sisters that come and bring them lunch, so it could be his sister that comes and picks him up... sorry about that.' and i told her it wasn't a problem. but then she tells me the reason she had asked if i had a boyfriend, was that she wanted to set me up with one of the other guys that work in the warehouse, chris. he's a good guy. really nice and funny. and she wanted to set me up with him... how funny! but the story gets better.

so i told darren, a guy at work, that oyuna had wanted to set me up with chris. and he makes some comment about what the dating setup we've got here! :D and i found this immensly hilarious. but yeah. so i was gonna ask robert if he had a girlfriend, but turned out i didn't have to. he came up around 4 pm and said, ' i just had a good chat with oyuna.' i said, 'oh... yeah?' and he told me,' i don't have a girlfriend. maybe when i talked to oyuna last i did. my crazy ex that trys to call me here, i broke up with her 2 1/2 weeks ago. but i don't have a girlfriend. but if you don't want to go out with me still, i understand.' i replied,' i do still want to go out with you, i just didn't want to deal with that.' and he said he completely understood. then he went back to the warehouse. then at closing time, he came up front again and said, 'so are we still on for tomorrow?' and i told him 'yeah. so what are we doing?' and he said he hadn't decided yet, he was trying to think of something fun. then he turned to go. but then turned back and said, 'oh, one more thing, i'm a pretty open guy. if you hear something about me, you can come ask me and i'll tell you.' i said,' okay. and i was gonna come ask you about the girlfriend thing, but oyuna beat me to it.' i also told him that i really don't have a hard time coming to ppl about things. so yeah. but we're on for tomorrow night!!! i really cannot wait. so that's been my interesting day!! :D

but then on saturday, i'm gonna hang out with my friend, jesse at the gateway. we're gonna hangout and catch up on life. get to know each other a bit better seeing as we've only met in person once and mostly chatted over the net...but yeah. it'll be fun!

but i'm so excited for tomorrow!!!! i think i'll burst from happiness and excitement! :D

averagejane signing off! : P