so more craziness....

so hey for my friend's sake i'm coming on to say, ' i made it back safe and sound from my hangout with jesse!' but at the same time, things are different. cuz here's what happened.

well, the hangout started out like 15-20 minutes late cuz i got lost and couldn't find parking. but then i caught up with jesse and we really had a good time. it was fun to be able to hang out and just chat. cuz when we first met, we went to dinner and a movie, and didn't have much time to talk. so this time was good. but near the end of our hangout, we went into the virgin megastore at gateway, cuz it had some sale cuz it was closing. and i have come to love the store for its sales. so we wandered around and talked and looked at cds and movies. then as we were walkin up to pay for my cd, jesse put his arm around my waist and said, 'i'm sorry for not talking much.' and i told him it was alright. and that i talk a lot. and when he put his arm around my waist for that brief few seconds, that's when i first wondered if he had started to really like me. and looking back, he seemed to recall bits about my life i had told him that i wouldn't have expected someone to remember. cuz i mentioned my ex. and he immediately said, 'dave?' like he remembered his name. this happened with a couple of other little facts. but then when we went up to the counter to pay, he saw that they had harry potter 1 and 2 for half off. so i was like oh... i want those...hmm.. and he did the whole arm around my waist thing but a bit different and longer. so i began to suspect something more. but it wasnt' until we were in the parking lot under the gateway that i began to think really much of anything. he walked me to my car and i was saying goodbye. then he put his arms on my waist as i was facing him and pulled me closer to him. he then said, ' i know this is out of the blue, but do you want to go out with me?' and i kind of hesitated. and he said, 'it's okay to say yes or no, either way.' and i said, 'possibly' and he said 'it's okay to say no.' and i said, 'i'd like to go on dates with you, but not boyfriend/girlfriend like.' and he said okay. then we said goodbye, hugged and he went to find his car.

then i came home and i was like oh what am i getting myself into....so i wrote him an email clarifying that i would like to go on dates, but just as friends, so i guess that's more of a hangout. but i told him that there is actually a guy i'm interested in right now. and that's robert. i like him and i want the chance to get to know him better. cuz he's way nice. and cute and funny. and i really want to go on a date with him. i wish that chris didn't have to be in the way. but i know how it hurts to lose a friendship. it really bites. and i am not gonna be the reason that robert and chris' friendship dies. so yeah. but maybe after i go on one date with chris, it'll work itself out. cuz i don't want to hurt chris' feelings. but i really want to go on a date with robert....it's way too complicated. oh well, at least it's not three guys anymore that i have to worry about. i'm glad i dealt with that before i dragged myself into a mess where i hurt a friend i care about. so yeah...

but i really did have a good day. i'm just tired....oh and i got my cell phone! it's exciting cuz i love being able to text ppl and call them. like i called jesse to know i'd be a little late. and i called home to tell them i'd be home in like 20 min. to 1/2 an hour. it was nice...but yeah. i just hope robert calls tonight. he said he would, but we got cut off yesterday in the middle of our conversation, so he might think i'm mad at him....or sumthin like that... so i still hope he calls. but hey i g2g...

average jane signing off...(life is crazy, but it'll settle soon..)